A few nights ago I was catching up on the blog. There are many more blogs out there about people’s private and kinky lives than there use to be. It’s good to know that there are others experiencing the same desires and adventures we are. It may be time to update our “parallel paths” links.
To get back on subject, Domina and I shared some conversation on what some other people out there were doing. One blog in particular, I have to go back and find it, was written by a woman that was very heavily into cuckolding. I have to give the woman credit, because she wrote something that really stuck to me. She told one of her bulls that he needed to understand her husband wasn’t letting him have sex with her, it was part of their relationship that he allowed her to have sex with others. I can kind of see where a bull might get confused. The element of humiliation may lead an outsider to think that the cuckoldress disrespects or does not love her man. Most of the exploits discussed on these types of blogs typically discuss the D/s related elements of such activities and downplay how the intimacy of it all pulls many couples together.
Anyway, reading about how some of the submissives were being treated promted Domina to ask, “you wouldn’t want me to treat you like that do you? You know, that mean.”
I hesitated. I really didn’t know how to answer. It was both yes and no. One the one hand we’ve well established that humiliation is a sexual stimulant to me. In a state of humiliation I’m much more submissive, happy and eager to be used. However, I’m not always in that frame of mind. In one moment Domina could tell me something like: “Get on your hands and knees you sissy bitch. You’re going to eat your dinner like a dog and scrub the floor with your toothbrush when you are done because you don’t deserve to be treated like the man I’m going to fuck later tonight.” I would be naked with an erection wanting nothing more than to prove I could obey. At another time, maybe after a hard day of work and doing my best to be all for all, I might insulted when I need to feel appreciation.
In the D/s relationship, the dominant again has the tougher job. She has to know when the buttons are green and when they are red. Typically, I think they can be green all the time. It’s like the scientific story about cooking the live toad. If you toss the frog in boiling water he’s going to jump out. If you put him in cool water and gradually turn up the heat he will happily let himself get cooked. A few kisses and some playful teasing, it doesn’t take a guy long to get those submissive juices flowing. Gradually turning up the heat to full blown emasculation and humiliation, your sub isn’t just eager to wash and dry the dishes, but be on his hand and knees scrubbing her Majesty’s bathroom with a toothbrush.
Yes, it may sound mean. To those that don’t understand a D/s relationship at all, it may sound abusive. But to the D/s couple that want to experience complete power exchange, it makes sense. There was a time Domina, wasn’t comfortable about rationing orgasms. Now she typically doesn’t care if I cum because she finds it easier to dominate me when I’m frustrated. As well, I love the feeling of submission that her sexual control gives me. I think the stricter harsher experiences like this are likely to have a similar effect over time.
-a
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