OPB=Other People's Blogs

Well,I am afraid that my post won't be near as exciting and hot for all of you as pet's last post was : ) Our readership seems to spike when pet posts his fantasies, so I am proud of that : )

On Sunday, pet and I finally got a chance to sit down with my laptop together and look through some other's people's blogs. That was fun and exciting, I really enjoyed that : ) Some of the stuff we saw is pretty hot, but some of it seems just really out there. Like, it's probably not real, you know? If it is real, then good for those people getting their freak on like that! But, that is not who pet and I are, we are more vanilla than that I guess, haha, so I guess our blog suits us just fine : ) We like to post about real things, because real things do very much affect our intimate times, for sure. Sigh.

Anyway, sorry I am kind or rambling today. It has been a good and bad week thus far. More financial issues, and some unexpected ones at that, so that has been frustrating me, issues with my unemployment claims, which seem to all come down to paperwork filing issues (not mine) so that won't be forthcoming until I have a hearing on Monday with our state commission, nothing but fun there. So meanwhile, I am bringing NO money into the house, and while pet is being amazing about it, I know it must frustrate him to be our sole support right now. And I don't blame him. I hate, hate, hate, that I am not participating financially right now and I am trying like hell to get a job. Good news is that I have a second interview with one place this afternoon, hopefully that will go well and lead to an offer letter, which I will snatch up. Now I am concerned about my credit rating/issues holding me back from being employed, God I hope that is not a problem...there is no issue with my criminal background check, but the other stuff, I just don't know. pet says not to worry, that there are alot of people in the country in alot worse shape that I am, but it is disturbing to me nonetheless. I have never had to worry about something like this being an obstacle from employment before. Sigh.

My tenant did not pay her rent on time, so that money is held up as well. She says it is coming...we shall see.....sigh.

pet is being amazingly supportive, and I know that he is very horny and desperate for me, and I keep falling asleep on him. It's not that I don't want pet, I want him VERY, VERY much, it's just by the end of the day I am worn out. Who would have thought that spending the day talking to people about jobs and money that you don't have would be so exhausting? But it is, and I am not sleeping at night for worrying about money and finding a job, so it is just a vicious cycle. Ugh.

Anyway, poor pet pet is so horny and desperate, and I am so distracted : ( I know he wants me to get a job and an income as well so that we can get back on track, in alot of ways...

I love him so much, and I am so lucky, I don't know what I would do without him. But, I don't feel like I am meeting his needs at all right now. I feel very inadequate, in all ways. I am not bringing in a paycheck, so I am not meeting my financial responsibilities in the relationship, in addition, I am costing him money now because he is having to cover some of my expenses now. Which really upsets me, but just can't be helped.

Anyway, so pet posts this very hot post yesterday, and it is hot, and I know it is. But all I can feel when I read it is inadequate, these are his fantasies, this is what he wants, and in addition to being a burden to him right now, I can't even meet his needs sexually. I never thought I would be this person, but I really NEED to work, I need to have my own income, I need to be self-sufficient, and I need to feel like I am doing my part in the relationship. I don't feel any of those things right now, so I don't feel confident, much less dominant. So......pet posts this wonderfully hot post, and all I can think is, "this is not who I am, I can't make this happen for him." I love him, and I want him to have his needs met, but I can't do this right now...or maybe not ever? I don't know, I don't want to be a fatalist, but that is just how I feel right now, but it is not a good day to ask me what I can and can't do I guess.

I am trying to get it together for the interview this afternoon, I REALLY need to make this happen, to get the offer. The money is not good, about half of what I used to make, but the benefits are good and the jobs seems pretty stable. Stability would be good. Very good, and a steady income. Sigh. Trying to focus...all indications are if I don't screw this up today an offer will be forthcoming...we shall see.

So...I guess that's where I am at. Oh, here are today's panty pics : ) I did at least manage to do that for pet this morning : )

Have a great day all-

-D